After your divorce, you may have hoped that you would never again have to talk to your ex or be required to work with him or her on anything. If you have kids together, however, you most likely share legal custody and decision making for your children. That means that major decisions about the children, including any religious issues, medical issues, and educational issues have to be decided together after your divorce.
When a big decision does come up about your child, try to work together. You may find that since the divorce, things have become less hostile between the two of you, and it may be easier to reach a decision on things than it has been in the past. If you two are unable to work together, such as if he or she is not being a reasonable person, consider putting your opinions in writing. Lay out the options for your child, pros and cons of each, any expert advice you have, and which choice you think is best. Ask for an answer on the issue by a certain date.
You may also consider involving a family member or a friend who can talk to your ex for you. An intermediary can often help the situation, because your ex’s hostility towards you will not be there and he or she can instead focus on the issue to reach a compromise.
Finally, when that doesn’t work, you have a couple of options. You can take your ex to court over the issue, or you can go ahead and make the decision for your child yourself, and let your ex take you to court. If your ex does take you to court, you will have proof that you tried to work together with him or her.