I am sorry to hear about your situation. It is never easy to make the decision to end a marriage, but divorcing an abusive husband can be particularly dangerous and scary. In your case, it’s critical that you think ahead before you act.
You are probably aware that telling your husband about your decision to file for divorce may spark his rage. If you are being threatened, you may need to get a domestic violence injunction, which is sometimes called a restraining order. However, for many abused women the first 24 hours after a restraining order has been issued is a very dangerous period. You may consider asking the police to drive by your house or you may want to stay somewhere else, like a women’s shelter, until the situation has settled down.
If you plan on leaving, you must take the children. This is for their safety, as well as for practical purposes. If you leave the children with your husband, he could possibly keep you from seeing them, and will have the upper hand in divorce negotiations.
When you choose a divorce attorney, you will want someone who is not easily intimidated, and who can do an excellent job of explaining your situation to the court. Once the divorce is underway, it’s possible that the evidence of domestic abuse could impact the custody arrangements, as well as the property settlement. You may consider asking the court for supervised visitation.